April 28, 2010

I haven’t blogged in about forever. I’m going to keep this one really short as I don’t have a lot of resources. I had my surgery. I saw the first results today. Not sure what I feel about the results. Changed my compression garment- sorry I did that. I hope it doesn’t affect my results. I’m exhausted now.

No Clue On How To Title This Entry.

It's almost midnight. I only have 31 hours left, and then I'm divorcing my stomach. Time is going by faster than I thought it would, but that's not too hard , because I thought it would be slooooooow. But it's just so/so slow. Tomorrow the cleaners come, and I have to start preparing for my road trip to my in-laws house. I wanted to pack 12 pillows; yes I do have that many available for packing, I'm my own Bed, Bath, and Beyond store. Wait did they go out of business? It doesn't matter you get the point.

It's time for bed. I have taken my sleeping meds. (a perk of being bipolar) This blog entry doesn't even make sense to me, but I had to write something. *Note to self: Do not blog while on sleeping medication. I'm going to put that in my back pocket for a later date. The funny thing is; I won't remember blogging this in the morning. I get amnesia from my sleeping pills. So that means when I open my blog tomorrow I will be reading this for the first time just like you are. How cool is that?

Wait, what was I blogging about? I'm having to think... oh right, only 31 hours until my surgery. Are you as excited as I am? I'd better go to bed. Thanks for reading.

Can't Stop Laughing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtp1xHvkVOk

Now it’s official I have lost it. Check out my newest youtube video.

Watching Paint Dry

Only 81 hours left until my life changes forever. In 81 hours I will be free from muffin top, and an overhang of belly flab that has haunted me forever.

When I got my lapband surgery I don’t remember counting down the hours. In fact I was too busy having my 'last meals'. Let’s see in 81 hours I would have been able to fit in five trips to Starbucks for my last rounds venti mochas and massive chocolate chip cookies, three runs to Dairy Queen for a large Blizzard, three trips through a Wendy’s drive-thru, a visit from the Pizza Hut delivery guy, a meal at Red Robin, and a ceremonious farewell cake and ice cream party. I probably could have done more buffeting, but I had to fast before my surgery.

I really don’t remember what my actual ‘last meal' was. I just remember having a lot of them. Those were good times. Yeah, but when it was time for surgery David had to roll me into the hospital due to the gazillion calories that I had consumed during my feasting.

For this life changing surgery I no longer have the desire to finance all of the fast food joints in town. So how do I fill my time? I have no idea. I could watch 81 episodes of Dr. Phil. No thank you; I think I would rather eat myself to death.

Tomorrow my friend is coming over to go shopping with me for David’s birthday. I have no idea what to get him. I want it to be something special after all I have nothing but time on my hands. I should be able to figure out something good to get him for his birthday. However in the afternoon I will be watching paint dry.

Thursday, I must get the house clean for the cleaners who are coming on Friday. Not clean-clean, but organized, and then after I'm finished I'll watch paint dry.

Friday, I must pack, watch paint dry until David comes home from work, take David out for his birthday dinner, and make the long trip out to his parent’s home where we will be staying the night.

Saturday, I will rise at 4:30 am, be at the clinic at 6:00 am, and at 7:00 am I will be counting backwards from 10.

Sunday, I will wake up and wish it was today when I wasn’t in so much pain. Be careful what you wish for...

Only 8 Days To Go Until My Tummy Tuck!!!!!!!

I’m rested up today, and reality has set in. I’m getting a full tummy tuck, muscle repair, and lipo done in eight short days!

There is so much to do. I have to shop. Normally I love shopping but shopping for medical supplies turns out to be on the bottom of my list of favorite things to shop for.

Yesterday, in the spirit of preparing for the big even I decided to venture into a medical supply shop. It was like walking into a car dealership, but instead of cars for sale it was wheelchairs and other motorized riding scooters that were up for sale. Row after row of wheelchairs and scooters, I didn’t know if I was supposed to take one to test drive while I shopped or what. I almost did; come on, some had baskets attached to them.

The thing that scared me the most is: this massive store was crowded. The malls may be empty, but wheelchair-scooter stores are packed. I guess it’s true the baby boomers still have all the money. My generations, and all the generations after mine are so screwed.

My shopping list included: latex gloves, hot & cold packs, two types of non-shower cleansers, two bed protection pads, and finally my favorite-a potty seat riser. Oh and there is still much more to buy, but I can buy the rest some where else. I need to support the malls. I wanted to buy a scooter, but none of them came in blue.

Today I called a house cleaning company to come in and do a full clean of my joint. I figure if I do it myself I run the risk of going manic or getting ill from exhaustion. We can’t have that can we? There is still so much to do around the house that the cleaners can’t do. I will have to get those things done myself. UGH. I am going to re-organize the office, the Cookie Monster room, (Yep, I have a room just for Cookie Monster.) clean out the refrigerator, kitchen pantry, cupboards, and finally I have to de-clutter every room in my home. Basically I have to make my home look like a show home. Currently my home is not messy; you could come over for dinner right now, and I would be proud to have you. But it has to be more than perfect after my surgery, because if it’s not I will fall into a deep depression. It’s just part of my illness. Don’t worry I have a list and I’m taking it slow.

There is so much to get done…

Am I Snoring Too Loud???????

I’m not taking care of myself the way I should be. I should’ve gone to the gym, but I went to Starbucks with a friend instead. I should’ve had a healthy lunch, but I opted for Cheerio’s with a banana, because I was too lazy to prepare a chicken breast. Now I’m sitting in my recliner eating Hershey Kisses. No wonder I feel like crap.

I need to get busy doing stuff, but I feel like sleeping. That’s doing something, right?

If you don’t know I’m getting a tummy tuck on April 24th-that’s right it’s only ten days away. There is so much to do! I don’t want to do any of it. Nada. None. Nothing. I need to clean the house, but instead I decided that making a bigger mess would be a better idea. I should be doing laundry. Nah, instead there is a mountain of dirty clothes that is so tall that if you were to climb it, you would need extra oxygen to get to the top. Youtube videos- those guys, I should be editing them. Forget about it. Like I said nothing. Instead of being a stream of activity I have turned into a pond of laziness.

I just went to sleep for a few hours…I can’t even muster the energy for this blog entry.

I will try and write more in a few days. What’s a matter with me? I think I’m just overwhelmed.

I did manage a short Youtube video.

Shrinking in Pictures

My weight loss journey started 25 years ago when I was ten; now I'm 35. I'm tired. But my lapband pushed me through. I'm at the end...well near the end. I thought I would give you a snapshoot in time of the changes I have gone through. Enjoy.

Now Were Tummy Tuck Talking

I swore when I started this blog that I would not ‘advertise’. You will never see a Maybelline ad on the right hand column of my blog. I’m not in this to make money. I’m in it to fart around. (Truth.) I’m about to sound like an advertisement but it is necessary; trust me.

This one goes out to all of the ladies who are considering, in line for, or even had reconstructive surgery. (A tummy tuck, Boob job, lipo, ect…) As you know I am getting a tune up myself, and being a good researcher I have been all over the internet looking for a site that will answer all of my plastics questions.

One day a woman emailed and told me about a private message board called Tummy Tuck Talk. Oh My Gosh this site is WONDERFUL. This site leaves no stone unturned. Every member is an active participant, and each of them is willing to answer every question you can think of. No longer do I Google…I just ask. And boom within minutes there are 10 responses. This site is a community of women.

Now, it is an exclusive site. In order to become part of this site you do have to be in some process of a plastic surgery situation, weather it is considering, planning, getting reading, during, or a veteran.

I will strongly caution you on one thing: it is addicting.

If you do decide to hop on over tell them Amy C. sent you, and then once your in make sure you friend me!
http://tummytucktalk.ning.com/

There Are So Many Ways To Blog:

I’ve been reading a lot of blogs lately. Reading blogs has kept me off of Ebay, which has been wonderful for my Amex card. I’m noticing some blogs are like diaries of what’s happening during people’s day, including their thoughts and feelings. I decided to make a mock blog for a house wife…with two kids, a husband, and no dog.

Here is an example of her blog:

‘I was driving the kids to school this morning, and Jenny decided that she was going to get sick all over the backseat of the car, and her brother Jake. I had to haul them both back home. Jake is an unruly child! Why must everything be a battle with him? He threw a temper tantrum because his Spider Man underwear was in the laundry. I could barely keep him from rolling around on the ground, kicking, and screaming; the boy is seven! I finally appeased him with the promise of ice cream. While I was fighting with Jake; Jenny threw up all over my bed; why didn’t she use the bowl I provided her? I didn’t have time to re-make my bed, so I put Jenny on the couch. I was just praying that there would be no more accidents. I had to find someone to take Jake to school. Mrs. Michaels from across the street, bless her 80 year old heart agreed to drive Jake back to school. He left the house with an ice cream stain on the front of his t-shirt. I am not likely to win mother-of-the-year.

I was frustrated because this always seems to happen on a day where I have something planned just for me. My best friend Fanny and I were going to go out to lunch, and then treat ourselves to mani-pedi. It’s been two months since I’ve spoiled myself. Jim controls the money. I feel like I’m slipping away from reality. I called Fanny to tell her that I had to cancel our lunch date. She was furious. This is the third time I’ve had to cancel on her. Fanny has no children, and is single. She doesn’t understand what its like to have sick a child, and a controlling husband like Jim who works an obscene amount of hours!!!

Speaking of Jim, I haven’t seen him lately; he tells me that he’s working, but I know he’s lying. I have no concrete proof, just a gut feeling. He assigned himself to work with Sheri, who happens to be knock-out gorgeous. I had no ideas that it was so imperative to work until two in the morning! I don’t think I could handle a forth affair; especially when I think I’m pregnant again. Jenny isn’t the only one getting sick. I’m too scared to take a pregnancy test. I talked to my friend Rachael, and she says that I should take a test, and then confront him about the affair. My mother says I should leave the bastard. I don’t even know if I love him anymore???

I have my secrets too. Last week I ran into an old boyfriend from high school. We had coffee, BUT nothing else. He’s divorced. I can’t get him off of my mind. He gave me his phone number. Should I call?

It’s hard being married to Jim, with two children, and the possibly of another one on the way. I depend on him for everything. Jim works, controls the money, and what if I am pregnant? I adore being able to stay at home with my children. I know that I'm lucky. Jim reminds me of it every chance he gets.

I would like to have some control of my life. I was supposed to go to the gym this morning! I haven’t gone in three weeks. Why haven’t I been going to the gym lately? I’ve gained six pounds. I’m falling apart…


Ahem…
Back to Amy…

I was thinking to myself how come I don’t write about my actual minute by minute stuff. I think because it would look something like this:

‘I rolled out of bed today with one thing on my list of things to do: go shopping with my friend. My friend was late picking me up, which made me upset because I needed my Starbucks fix. When we actually made it to the mall I was in a better mood thanks to the mocha I had in my hand. I spent way too much money on this cute blue coat, but I loved it too much to pass it up. David was making garlic chicken dinner when I got home. I love it when he makes dinner for me. After dinner David and I played Scrabble; David won. I’m convinced he cheated somehow, but I can’t proof it. After a cup of Earl Grey tea we went to bed.’

Boring!

I break my day into subjects, and that is what I blog about.

On this particular day I could have chosen to blog about the following:

A. How my friend drives me crazy because she is late most times.
B. How addicted I am to Starbucks, and if I don't get my fix I’m a grump monster.
C. The cute blue jacket I just had to buy.
D. How much I love David for cooking a meal for me.
E. David cheating at Scrabble.

If I had the other lady’s day I don’t think I would blog. I think I would find the cash, do some crazy stuff to Jim’s favorite organ, give the kid some anti-nausea pills, find a baby-sitter, and get my nails done, but that’s just me.

Manic Monday

It's 2:23 in the morning and I can stop feeding the 'hungry monster'. At 10:20 I started with an apple, peanut butter, and a slice of cheese. At 11pm I gave into my 'chocolate monster' and ate 10 Hershey Kisses. At 1:19 am I ate the left-over Mexician dinner, and finially I chowed down on a peanut butter cookie. I'm on an all-night food binge. My stomach is finally full...but my mind is so busy. If my mind racing around could burn calories I would be so uber thin. I know it is time for me to go to bed, but on nights like tonight I can't. I just want to run around the house screaming at the top of my lungs. No really I do. I don't want to scream anything in particular. I just have this overwhelming sense to bounce off of the walls.

What does one do when one wants to keep one self occupied? Clean out the closets! Rearrange the pantry! Clean the garage! No I don't want to clean the garage...Run on the treadmill...hey that sounds like fun. It's just another manic Monday...(okay it's Tuesday, but I haven't went to sleep so it doesn't count.)

Fighting Over Chocolate

This weekend was rough around the edges for me, but I survived. It was touch and go at times. There was talk about bringing in a priest for last rights, and I'm not even Catholic. David suggested carting me down to the hospital. ‘Nope, no way, no how!’

It was a bummer to be sick on a long weekend, especially when I don’t get to see David that often. I can’t wait until tax season is over.

When I did take a moment away from dying this weekend I ended up in a heated discussion with David. I became privy to some vital information: the Easter Bunny was not to have gone s’hopping for Easter gifts for David. I wish someone had contacted the Easter Bunny beforehand. During our ‘discussion’ it was mentioned that the Easter Bunny that David employed did not go s’hopping this year for me. (Fire that bunny!) I thought it was funny that he was stressed about some silly little chocolate; after all he is working a million hours a week, and I really wasn’t expecting him to find the time to s’hop. In the end I had to promise that I wouldn’t give him any gifts. I promised.

The next morning I woke up and David was MIA. I thought he may have gone for a nice 10k run. (I know it’s gross. Who does that?) He came back an hour later with an Easter basket, and a Starbucks for me. I was happy, but I was confused as to why he had done such a thing. But it became clear as soon as I saw that the Easter Bunny had left David an Easter basket full of gifts. ‘Shut up, how did that happen?’ I tried to explain that I was as surprised as he was, but he didn’t believe me.

He told me that he came down to the kitchen to make tea, and he spotted his pile of presents, and thought- Amy is a liar! He then grabbed his coat, and headed out the door.

I don’t think that I lied at all. He told me not to give him anything. The Easter Bunny did it, therefore I’m innocent on all charges. Plus even if I am guilty he deserves all the treasures in the world. I love that guy.

Still Sick

I'm still sick, but I feel better than I did yesterday. Yesterday was a nightmare. I won't go into the details. Eating wasn't fun, but neither was anything else. I didn't want to even drink water. David being worried went to the store and bought me some ice cream. Before he went he asked me what kind I wanted. It was a very hard choice. I either wanted chocolate or vanilla. (I wish they made one that just had those two flavors. Get rid of strawberry already.) He said he would buy one of each. We could afford the expense; soon David would be rolling in cash from my life insurance money. He came home with a carton of ice cream that was just chocolate and vanilla. (Great I used my wish on ice cream! I could have used my wish on...oh I don't know...getting better.) But still I enjoyed the little bit I could get down.

Today I still feel weak, but I'm positive tomorrow I will be much better.

Have a Happy Easter.

April 1st- No Blog Entry

No blog today. Caught the stomach flu. Stuck at home with flannel jammies on- that’s good news. (The jammie part, not the stuck at home part.) Watching crap TV. Drinking diet tonic water. (And you thought I was perfect. Who likes tonic water straight up? Yuck! Me! I love the stuff.) Hoping that I die soon, or get better, either one would be a blessing over how I’m feeling at this moment. If I don’t die tonight I will try and write tomorrow. I think I might be a little delusional…